Sunday, March 10, 2013

Auf Wiedersehen Remy

Friends, Romans, Countrymen...lend me your ears. I come to bury Remy.

It's official: Remy the Wonderbug is no more. The little grey bug that could no longer zips these fine Chicago streets like he/she once did. He/she was a great car (although I could never settle on a gender for him/her) and gave me two blissfully happy years. We've been through thin and thick, snow and heat, rain and sleet. We've seen drive-thrus of all varieties. We've trekked to the middle of nowhere in Iowa, the middle of nowhere in Indiana, and the middle of nowhere in Wisconsin together. We've been through a rusted out catalytic converter, a flat tire, confusing check engine lights, coolant issues, and oil burning problems alike. So many jams were shared. So much Blink 182. So much Mariah Carey. SO MUCH T-SWIFT.

I loved him/her from the first time I laid eyes on him/her. Remy (short for Remington Steele) brought me to this city on four wheels and a dream. Parked on 18th Place every morning so quaintly, ready and waiting to cheerfully whisk me to the west side 'hood. So compact and conducive to parallel parking in those other spots that the SUVs need to leave behind.

People would look at Remy and say to me, "Oh yeah, that car is so YOU." 

SURE there was not a functioning cruise control. And YES there were multiple times where I feared he/she might spontaneously combust. But we had a bond, that beautiful German car and I. And while nobody can replace Remy, alas, another vehicle has risen to the occasion. Meet Sam.

photo

Sam is a Toyota Corolla. Also nice and compact. He is definitively male and has already started to bond with the other cars on my street. He enjoys Mexican takeout just like Remy did and Pilsen suits him well. The Germans have conceded the defeat for now. Sam, I should tell you, is imported from Japan. Sam, short for Samurai. He brings a new set of cultural values with him. He will work tirelessly to dependably bring honor to my household by not flashing weird warning lights every two minutes and therefore embarrassing me in front of the same Autozone guys every two weeks like his predecessor. He's smooth I tell you. I think Remy and Sam would've been friends. 

A new era has begun: Sam and Anna, Chapter 1. 

2 comments:

  1. I just had to give up my bug Zooey for literally the same reasons a few months ago! (Also, I totaled it?) But she had that exact list of issues before the accident too. Sad, but exciting to move on. Congrats on Sam!

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  2. Welcome to the Toyota fam-bam! Mine is a camry, and his name is Seymore! He is fantastically reliable! I hope the same for Sam.

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