Mean Girl

I knew it would happen eventually.

All the signs were pointing in that direction.

I've officially become a mean teacher. Maybe the meanest. 

Here's the quick little story: One of my kids was "cutting up," as we like to say. Also known as trying to be funny so everyone else laughs at him. I told him to go chill on the carpet so he could get himself together and come back to his seat in a few minutes. He then blared out "MSSSS GASHHHH CAN I GO TO THE BATHHHROOOOMMM!?" to which I replied that we were all going as a class in 5 minutes (we have to go as a class on bathroom breaks because our school is taking standardized tests that require silence in the hallways, so I can't send him out alone). This kind of thing happens approximately 6,534 times a day and I've never had a problem. Except this time, instead of him nodding his head and waiting a few minutes, he had an accident on the carpet.

I'm sorry about the time I made you pee your pants in class.
And I'm sorry for telling everyone about it.
And I'm sorry for repeating it now.

I felt terrible. Like, absolutely terrible. I can not shake it. I helped him out into the hallway once my co-teacher got back and dealt with him, his parents (that's another story), and myself. I explained to him how awfully I felt about it and of course how he needed to be following directions in the first place so that I could've really understood that he had to, indeed, use it bad. He said he knew that he should've been following directions and not yelling out. He also said he knew that if it is truly an emergency he can quickly go and explain it to me afterwards. My apology was given, his apology was given, and we're all good. Luckily my class was pretty chill for some reason at this time and he wasn't embarrassed at all and only one or two kids even knew what had happened. I keep telling myself excuses like "Hey, there was nothing you could've done! He would've been sent right back in our classroom if he went in the hall by himself because of the testing going on! He shouldn't have been acting crazy! He should have told you earlier!" Still, no matter what, I go back to the fact that I am the teacher who made a little kid have an accident. I suppose it could happen to any teacher. But tonight I totally feel like scummy Regina George when she wouldn't let Gretchen Wieners wear her white gold hoops to school.

And that is SO. NOT. FETCH.  

Bros...brothers...brethren?

Yes, you Amanda Bynes fans...that was a quote from She's the Man! It's been too long since I've seen that movie. That is going back on the list.

Well today I learned a lot, particularly more appreciation for those two older brothers of mine. Today was QUITE THE DAY. I slept over at Rudi's house (Chicago area) and had planned to be back home before lunch so I could spend the day studying. Great plans right? Right! High five Anna! Well, then this happened.

I was all packed up after breakfast, off crusin' along in Remy the WonderBug, basking in the superior German engineering that accompanies the VW brand, and all of a sudden something was weird. The usual smooth driving felt a little floppy. And then I turned a corner, only to hear the FLAPFLAPFLAP of a flat tire hitting the pavement. I yelled "OH CRAP" to nobody in particular and threw on the hazards. Yep. This is the sight that met me. So my original plans for today went awry (cue the quote of plans and mice and men) and I had to move forward and deal with this. And by deal with this I mean stand watch while others deal with it. And by others I mean my brother.

After going 2 miles per hour to retrace my path back to Rudi and Steph's house, Stephanie and I called Rudi to come save us damsels in distress. Big brothers can come in handy. He changed that tire like a boss and I drove back to Wisconsin, 2 hours later than expected. I then drove to a shop near my house and they took care of the replacement. Finally, by 4:00, I was home in time to run, shower, eat, and head to a very special event. This is where the day took a drastic turn for the AWESOMER.

The whole family headed over to my Grandpa's house for his birthday party. The guy is awesome. He turned 89 today. This milestone, paired with family togetherness (always new babies of my cousins to oogle at), and cake made my day into a huge plus. 

Before we left I got a photo op with the birthday boy himself. (I love his napoleonic hand gesture.) We got home and I settled in my spot on the couch to catch up on reality television with my parents, and just when I thought the day couldn't end on a better note, I was reminded yet again how big brothers can come in handy. Lookie here, Alex went ahead and made frozen margaritas! My fave! Sugar on the rim, of course. Just add chips and salsa from Chili's, and you have my favorite meal. Yes, chips and margaritas create a complete meal. 

So while today veered drastically from my original plans, it was full of brothers, birthdays, and learning the definition of lug nut. I'll drink to that. Cheers! 

Perspective

Graduation has passed, and life is moving on along. Between my full-time job of official American Idol and Dancing With the Stars commentator with my parents (don't you dare judge me), I am beginning to actually check things off the list in preparation for my job at a charter school and Teach For America. I've been neglecting THE LIST for some time now, and it needed to be addressed now that finals are through.

But a rabbit trail first. Okay. Sue me if you disagree, whatever. But is it just me or did American Idol get way softer? All the judges are big gummy teddy bears and never say anything remotely critical other than, "Yo dawg, for me...it was aiggght." Since when did RANDY become the BAD GUY? That is the worst they can come up with. What happened to the days of Simon bringing a girl to tears for hitting a wrong note, then crossing his arms over his skin-tight t-shirt in disgust at her emotional weakness? In tonight's episode I heard like eighty flat pitches and a bunch of lyric mess-ups and nothing. Nada. Zip. All sunshine and happiness from the panel of judges. Obviously, Steven Tyler has no idea what's going on around him anyway. But Randy and J-Lo, I'm disappointed! I mean, I'm all about positivity, but let's be honest when that chick doesn't hit her notes! It's okay to be honest! Okay, okay. I get it. Too much reality television for Anna. I need to find a book. 

Back to THE LIST of shtuff. (I like to say it shtuff...sounds more Yiddish to me. Why that matters to a non-Jew like myself? Not sure.) There is THE LIST of to-do items. I've dedicated myself to jumping through these flaming hoops with thorough, punctual efforts. I take great pride in jumping through said hoops with little complaint. But. Then yesterday happened. I hit a wall.

For a solid 5 hours straight, I worked through financial plans, background checks, fingerprinting, online HR websites that malfunctioned for the 6th time, exchanging long e-mails with Frank from customer support at said HR website, HMOs, PPOs, retirement plans, apartment searching, roommate hunting (....anyone? anyone? Bueller?), transcript ordering, e-mail responding, and hair-ripping-outing.

Blech. I was ready to barf. Then it turned out that I had to spend today driving 2.5 hours each way to Chicago for a 15 minute meeting with a guy who took my fingerprints.

But. Alas. This is life. 

Life is annoying sometimes. Life is messy. Life puts you through four different voicemail systems and hangs up on you at the end of the 20-minute muzak track. Life makes you navigate through construction zones to find no-tow parking lots in the city. Life makes you wait in line at the DMV. Life has details that you just need to man up and figure out. Life is full of this stuff (shtuff, if you will). And it is only the beginning for me, especially as a newbie in both the adult world and education world. I've thought about how I got overwhelmed yesterday morning since it happened and got sort of disappointed in myself for getting so frustrated at the annoying details. I've come up with two solutions for myself, and they've worked well for me in the last 48 hours.

Solution 1: GO TO SLEEP.

My favorite activity, ever. This is always helpful. After sleeping on anything I have more clarity. It's great to get distance from whatever you're contemplating in order to sort it out. Sleep has a beautiful way of taking the edge off of angry arguments, tedious bureaucracies, and stressful workloads. It just helps. If sleep is not an option, of course, I have another for you.

Solution 2: GET PERSPECTIVE.

Take one minute. One single minute. Back it up. And remember why you are doing what you are doing. Why you are living your life and who you are living it for. I did this today whilst stuck in traffic. It was wonderful. Why am I running around like a crazy zombie trying to get fingerprints, apartments, budgets, credit cards, direct deposit, benefit packages, and eight million e-mails all accomplished? Because I am blessed to have a job that will teach me not only about myself and others but how I can use my abilities to love and help a broken world. Simple as that. When I remember that, I get perspective. I take one minute to remember WHY the heck I'm doing what I'm doing, and it's all a whole lot simpler. And happier. Of course living in the moment is wonderful (here is a big reason why), but the big-picture perspective is necessary for those individual moments to be enjoyed. In order to not get bogged down and drown in the details, you need to always stay afloat on your noodle of perspective. (See how I worked that metaphor in there? Yeah, I have a Bachelor's in English. That's what I'm using it for.) That one minute of perspective changed my attitude for the next few hours.

I laughed at my laptop when I read this. What great perspective. 

Obviously, nobody lives stress-free. This stuff happens. But I want to do my best to lead a life of joy, even in the midst of the little crap that I'm tempted to allow to bother me. And when all else fails, of course, I think I'll just take a nap. 

There's A Bug Going Around

Remy the Wondercar isn't doing so hot. In fact, she's a little sick. She's come down with the flu or something. And by flu, of course, I mean "a flex pipe in the catalytic converter that has rusted out." To-may-to, to-mah-to.

Yesterday was a sad day for me, as I had to hear my car's (expensive) diagnosis over the phone on my way to class. I, of course, immediately called my dad, Brian (or B-Money as we like to refer to him) who is coincidentally not just my dad, but THE Wonderdad himself, and he found a dealer back home in Wisconsin who can take care of the problem for much less money. So this weekend I'm going home as as a very nervous, naive carowner who will entrust that the bug will get fixed and back to normal.

I've gotta say, car troubles are scary. It is scary both to my wallet and self. First, to my wallet, because this car is the most valuable thing I have (not hard to do when all of your other possessions were bought at Forever21 on sale). Secondly, it's scary also because I have this little relationship going with my car. This is my first car, and I have to say, every time I get inside to drive, it just makes me happy. It's like we're friends. Maybe that's weird to you, but this is also coming from the girl who talked to her stuffed animals when she was little. I make friends with my stuff, it's no big deal. 

So here's praying that 1) Remy and I make it back to Wisconsin this weekend and 2) The car comes back brand-spankin'-new and better than ever! She's pretty spunky, so I think she'll pull through for me.